Summer School

Well it is that time of the year again. The weather is hot. The pools are open. The ladies are working on their tans. The guys are watching the ladies working on their tans. It is summertime, and every American man, woman, and child knows what that means…

Summer school.

In the past two summers I have gone to more summer school than the guy who went streaking at senior picnic and the tikes at Barcroft Elementary School combined. Like most college football programs, North Carolina wants its players to attend summer school so that we can train as a team. So on May 15th I left Asheville and returned to Chapel Hill so that I could wreak havoc on the weight room and administer justice in the classroom.

When I arrived at my Chapel Hill residence I was greeted by a pleasant surprise. My roommate Connor Gonet gave me the good news that he had finally brought another into this world. I gave him a high five, butt slap, and the vow that anyone who was in his family was also in my family. Mi casa es su casa. Except with families. Connor blessed me with the opportunity to be the very first person outside of his father to meet his new baby—Terry Vip.

If first impressions are everything, then Connor’s new scooter sucks. But I like to think that they are not everything, and that Terry has a fighting chance in this cold world. I am not going to lie; I initially hated Terry because I hilariously thought he might offer competition to Buddy Blackjack for the fastest scooter at UNC. But after I came to my wits and realized that Terry had no shot of challenging Buddy’s throne, I realized that Connor’s new scooter really was a class act. I even introduced him to Buddy Blackjack himself. I could tell they really hit it off and I couldn’t help but foresee an extraordinary relationship forming in the future

Even with Buddy’s tutelage, it is doubtful that Terry will ever really be the “Future Champion.”

Buddy and Terry embrace each other in a warm hug.

With my first summer session already started off on a good foot, I was excited to see what my first week of class and workouts would bring. Summer workouts are challenging, but they are also invigorating because everyone is hungry to accomplish new goals. To do this, everyone has different ways they keep themselves motivated. Some like to scream and yell things that could easily be spoken, like my fellow Gun Club member Bryn Renner. Others like to notify the world about their relentless grind through daily tweets, like pretty much the whole defense. Yet, some like to take the approach of writing their goals down and putting them in a place they will see everyday so they are constantly reminded to keep pushing forward.

That, my friends, is a triple negative.

I am not exactly sure what J-Boyd is trying to say in this motivational quote. All I am sure of is that he is working hard to accomplish it. I am interested to see what he meant whenever he takes the field next year and shows America what he has worked for all summer.

Workouts are just part of the summer experience at Carolina. The other aspect of daily life is school. I am taking a general education requirement, English 102, for the first summer session. Following my own personal guide to academic success, I tried to start the semester off on a good foot. For our first assignment our professor wrote us a letter about herself and asked us to reply with a letter about ourselves by the next morning. Because networking and relationships are everything in life, I spilled my guts in my letter confessing everything that I am and that I stand for. Since I know that the “About the Author” tab is probably the weakest on this site, I have updated it with an exact copy of my letter to my professor. You can check it out here.

The coolest part about my English class is that Andrew Luck, former Stanford quarterback, sits across the room from me. It has been in the news recently that he is missing the beginning of Colts training camp to finish his degree. I suppose the media attention was too much for him in California, which caused him to transfer to UNC.

Finishing his degree before starting NFL career.

Obviously, this is an incredible opportunity for me to learn from an elite quarterback about how to carry myself in a classroom setting. Since the first day of class, I have blatantly ignored my professor and intently studied his every move. I think he can tell I am staring at him, but he probably just thinks I am checking out his sweet neck-beard.

You have to respect his neard game.

At one time I was convinced that Andrew had the best neck-beard in the country, but he lost my fanhood when he sold out and went to a full beard. There is nothing I hate worse than a sellout.

Biggest sellout since Ice Cub acting in “Are We There Yet.”

What many of you probably do not realize is I too can grow a menacing neck beard. At my optimal moment of growth during spring finals, I decided to take the always-awkward Photo Booth pic of myself in order to document my neard in history. In efforts to reduce awkwardness, I tried to show cleavage and do the duck face like a lot of my friends on Facebook. Unfortunately, I couldn’t use those pics because they took away the emphasis on my neck-beard.

Ladies love the neck beard.

VOTE HERE TO PIC BEST NECK BEARD. 

Anyways, before I knew it the week had come and passed and it was the weekend. After a hard week, I rewarded myself with a trip to Charlotte to check out Drake’s Club Paradise Tour to watch the likes of Drake, Waka Flocka, 2 Chains, and J Cole perform live.

I couldn’t decide what shirt I wanted at the concert, so I just got the ear plugs.

My friends and I really let loose at the concert, busting out dance moves and just raising cane in general. You can check out some of our riotous antics below. Luckily we didn’t get kicked out before J Cole took the stage. Criiib!!

Overall, my first week back to college was solid enough to get me looking forward to the rest of the summer. However, to me, a week is not a successful one if you don’t learn something. So to both of you readers who have made it all the way to the end of this post without clicking back over to Twitter, I will leave you with some wise words that I picked up this past week. “It you put it up, put it back down.”

Wisdom.

Until next time,

Caleb

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